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Eastwatch: Daenerys is falling in love, Cersei is knocked up

GoT

Seriously, you must have watched the latest episode of Game of Thrones by now. It’s Tuesday for Pete’s Sake, how slow can you be? But then, a girl is not judging just warning you that you will find spoilers here.

While lacking any major fight scenes, the fifth episode Eastwatch was the perfect way to cool off from the Loot Train Battle in The Spoils of War.

We jump right off to it with Bronn saving Jaime from the depth of the river. Like Game of Thrones would just let Ser Jaime drown, pfft. Drowning is for inconsequential characters like say Ed Sheeran who is probably part of the Lannister army who took the heat from Drogon.

Nooo, Dickon Tarly, I liked that guy with his handsome face and really, really weird name. But I guess Daenerys and Drogon had to have their fun. Fare thee well Dickon and Lord Randyll Tarly (you sir I didn’t like).

Despite Drogon’s briefly showing off, there were a lot of moments to live for in Eastwatch, more reunions to remind us that Game of Thrones gives as much as it takes, a surprise announcement from Cersei, Jon petting Drogon (this is where I lost my shit) and so many lingering looks between Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen.

Guys, it seems like the Mother of Dragons couldn’t keep her eyes off the King in the North. We saw it, it started way back before Jon petted Drogon, that side glance she threw him in episode 4. Jon is that guy who comes to your house and falls in love with your kids like they are his own. Who wouldn’t want that?

Dany even had the audacity to forbid the noble King in the North to go beyond the wall because, well, people die beyond the wall. She swallowed hard at that moment, just couldn’t keep her eyes off him and no more talks of “bending the knee.”

“If I don’t return at least you wont deal with the King in the North anymore.”

“I’ve grown used to him.”

Hmmm, love just knocks you off your feet when you least expect it, doesn’t it Daenerys?

Jorah Mormont saw it too (welcome back good soldier), even Tyrion didn’t miss this developing love story.

A round of applause for Tyrion, he had his first drink of the season now he can know more things. Or maybe they are just more terrible strategies that Cersei will use to her own advantage.

I smell a White Walker alliance coming because Cersei, well, is crazy.  And now she is with child, or is she? With Cersei you can never know for sure.

Oh Arya, to be young and restless. Our little assassin has gone for many days without killing something, she was just dying to stick Needle into anyone’s throat say like Lords of the North or even her own sister Sansa.

Arya was way in over her head in Eastwatch that she played right into the hands of schemer extraordinaire Littlefinger. The Lord Protector of the Vale planted a letter Sansa wrote to Robb a while back when she was still Joffrey’s play thing. If you remember correctly, Sansa was forced to pen this letter by Cersei to ‘talk sense into her family’ to bend the knee to then King Joffrey after Ned Stark was arrested for treason.

You can read more about the contents of the letter here.

It’s a shame that the Faceless Men do not teach their students how to scheme. A girl has fallen into a trap. Now a girl is out to murder her sister. Y’all think Sansa is on Arya’s list now? Sleek Littlefinger, very sleek but still piss off you creep.

Better news than Arya getting played, Gendry is back and he can swing a hammer. White Walkers should be very afraid. Just imagine a band of misfits Jon Snow, Gendry, Jorah Mormont, Tormund and his Free Folk, The Hound and the Brotherhood Without Banners heading beyond the wall. Again, White Walkers should be very afraid.

Boo to Sam for ignoring the biggest revelation from Gilly – Jon is actually a legitimate Targaryen!😲😲😲

Quick question, where is Grey Worm and the Unsullied?

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The Spoils of War: Hell hath no fury like a dragon scorned

drogon1

The internet is dark and full of spoilers.

The script of the fourth episode of Game of Thrones may have been leaked (to those who read it, TRAITORS) but still The Spoils of War hit hard like a wrecking ball of fire.

In the previous three episodes, things were starting to look quite easy for Cersei, a little too easy for someone with that many enemies. Through her blood-thirsty ally Euron Greyjoy, she had defeated Daenerys’ allies, raided Highgarden for gold and became a new favourite for the Iron Bank. Such luck, we were beginning to worry.

In retaliation to the Queen’s Justice, the Mother of Dragons serves up her own justice against the Lannister’s army (after nagging Jon about bending the knee). Heeding to Lady Olenna’s advice “You are a dragon, be a dragon,” Dany swoops in just in time to show Cersei who the real Queen is.

Riding Drogon, the fearless Dothraki by her side, the Lannister army doesn’t stand a chance. This is the moment we have all been waiting for. For Daenerys to give Westeros a little taste of her dragon’s fury. It’s a masterpiece, and everyone including Jaime and Bronn are in awe as the platinum blond miniatured on Drogon’s back awashes the Lannister army with dragonfire. “Dracarys.” And everything in Drogon’s path turns into dust. Fire and blood.

Oh, wait a minute, the Lannisters possess a secret weapon – Qyburn’s dragonkiller cross-bow.

Wounded by Bronn, Drogon isn’t one to go down without a fight. Game of Thrones creators must really love Bronn because how he escapes the dragonfire is really, really questionable. Major characters have gone down for a lot less.

Or maybe his life is spared so he can save Jaime who, caught in the heroism of the moment and seeing Drogon wounded, seizes the moment to attack Dany.

Bad move mate, as echoed by his brother Tyrion who watches from a distance as Jaime advances towards Dany. Tyrion knows it, we know it, Drogon will protect his mother at all costs. He unleashes fire on the advancing Lannister. Uh-oh, is this how it ends for the Kingslayer, death by dragonfire?

Swoosh, Bronn to the rescue. The last we see of Jaime is him plunging deep into the river unsure whether he is dead or alive. Is this how he dies, death by drowning? That’s not a death befitting someone as significant as Ser Jaime. But then Game of Thrones is never here to please anyone.

Away from dragons and fire, behold, a girl is home. Arya Stark’s reunion with her siblings Sansa and Bran, er the Three-Eyed Raven, was beautiful to watch but nothing quite beats her friendly combat with Brienne of Tarth. Brienne, the tall thing of beauty she is, towers over Arya who wields Needle (a laughable weapon at first glance) but quite a dangerous one once she starts waterdancing around Brienne.

Brienne: Who taught you that?

Arya: No One.

Jaqen H’gar would be proud.

It’s quite a match, even Sansa and creepy Littlefinger can’t believe the metamorphosis of young Arya Stark.

For a show that has been criticized for belittling and raping women, GoT has sure come a long way in the strong woman narrative, from the empowered former slaver multi-translator Missandei to the brilliant and enlightened Sansa Stark. This is no longer a war of Kings but of Queens.

Watch carefully Littlefinger, the night is dark and full of terrors. If Brienne doesn’t slice his throat, maybe Arya will. I pray for that day.

Emo Bran continues to break women’s hearts as he succumbs deep into being the Three-Eyed Raven. Meera Reed, I speak on behalf of everybody when I say, we value your services to Bran and to the North. You were more than just Bran’s Uber driver to us.

 

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